"And just what the hell am I supposed to do with these?"
"I requested minions of darkness, and you gave my fluffy jellybeans."
I love this post so much
hello 911 yes i touched wet food while doing the dishes i’d like surgery to remove my hand
"The Green Ribbon" by Alvin Schwartz.
This has been my favorite since I was little.
I used to find and read this all the time in my 4th grade classroom. I’ve been looking for this forever.
One of the stories that got me interested in weird shit when I was little.